Revenge is mine!

About two or three times a year, a particular coworker comes into work with a cold that morphs into a lingering cough that often lasts two or three weeks. She sits in the cubicle on the other side of my half-wall.

All day long, I hear: HACK HACK HACK COUGH HACK.
For two or three weeks!
And she always refuses to take medicine to suppress the coughs. Despite our not-so-subtle hints to do so.

Finally, I have a similar type of cold that is morphing into a cough. Her turn to suffer! Well, it probably won't be as bad. For one, my colds/coughs rarely last more than a few days. And two, I am actually medicating - or more accurately, suppressing the symptoms. Despite that, I still have an occasional coughing fit. After the first fit this morning, the coworker's head popped up over the wall and she asked, "Gosh, are you sick??"

Cough..."You think?"

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Ahhhchooo!

Have gotten very little done this weekend, thanks to a cold. It's the first time I've gotten truly sick in the past 8 months or so. I try not let it stop me from doing stuff, but it's hard to focus. We've all been there.

So I've been doing stuff that doesn't require much intelligence. Cleaning. Laundry. Watching lots and lots of TV online at Hulu.com - speaking of, why would they subtitle first season of a show, but not the second? Oh, the agony! I should complain, but I don't know who to complain to. That requires too much thinking.

Poor Apollo is DYING to go for a long walk or two, but I only have enough energy to walk him up and down my street. I feel bad for him. He's been very patient though.
All the tissues I've used in the past two days.

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Waterfall Deux

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Swallow Falls, MD

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Udda udda!

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Open Letters

Dear A-hole Driver,

I'm sure your SUV gives you a false sense of security, but believe me, just because you can't see me while passing me does not mean I, in my little Civic Coupe, disappeared. You came literally within an arm's length of my car. I could have reached out my window and touched your door. With ease. When I honked, you swerved back into your lane. Then, I saw your hand emerge into the window frame, giving me the one-finger salute.

I'm not sure what I did or didn't do to merit that. Did I honk too long? I promise you, it was just a tap. Should've slowed down for your highness? I'll wonder until my dying day.

Such class!
Jen
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Dear A-hole Drive Numero Dos,

I was tooling along in the left lane, passing a number of tightly packed cars, at a more-than-respectable *cough* pace. Most of the other cars were going somewhere between 65, the posted speed limit, and 70. I'm not the sort of person who can sit comfortably behind a long line of cars and decided to pass them, and did so at a fairly good clip (yet not speeding excessively). You, A-hole Dos in an ugly sedan, came from behind and started tailgating me. You were clearly unhappy that I was not going fast enough.

Well, sir, I'm sorry, but as long as I'm going fast enough to pass cars, that's fast enough. When I was able to, I did change into the right lane. And while passing me, you looked directly at me, flipped a bird, and mouthed to me, "Read between the lines!"

I have to quote Monty Python here. "I do not think it means what you think it means."

When you realized I was laughing hysterically at you, you spewed a few choice, four-lettered words and gestured wildly before speeding off at, I'd hazard to guess, about 90 mph.

Such class!
Jen
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Dear Apollo,

I'm delighted that you had a grand ol' time today. You got to run around off-leash for a bit, and even went wading into a shallow part of the river. But, darling, when you do that, please check and make sure you can feel the bottom before plunging into a muddy part of the river. You gave your mistress a heart attack when you plunged into a sinkhole. I was about a half-dozen steps into the river when you managed to scramble out, none for worse.

Apollo, one of these days, whether you like it or not, I will make you learn how to swim! For the peace of my mind.

Lots of love,
Jen

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Dear Coworker,
I'm glad that you thought Swallow Falls, MD was a gorgeous, wonderful, magical place to be. But, please, refrain from exaggerating. I came here expecting a cousin of Niagara Falls, and was sorely disappointed. One dinky little waterfall (but very pretty) and another dinkier little waterfall (somewhat pretty) does not equate "majestic."

Note to self: Next time, research the site before driving 7 hours round-trip.

Apollo has a blast though!
Jen

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The cowardly lion

Apollo is precious and holds a place in my heart. I love him, he's my big baby. But I can laugh at him. And do so often.

A couple nights ago, we went out for a walk. On our way back in, we passed the little garden in my front yard that's always humming with bumblebees - there's some plants in there that they love. When we got in the house, Apollo started to give me funny looks over his shoulder.

I noticed, but didn't think much of it. I thought he was just being silly, as he sometimes is. Then, in my bedroom, he stared at my pants intently. Definitely something up. I looked down, and saw a fat ol' bumblebee hanging onto my pants. It probably had been buzzing away all along. I looked back up to find a container to trap the bee in it, and where was Apollo?

Standing on my bed, as far away as he could get from me, with a look of horror on his face. (No, I'm not anthropomorphizing Apollo - he really did look scared.)

Snickering, I found a glass and trapped the bee in it - and checked to see if it was the stinging type - it wasn't. I tried to show it to Apollo, but he just ran to the other side of the room. My big ol' dog who sleeps through thunderstorms is scared of a fat bumblebee.

He's also afraid of cats. There're a couple outdoor cats who Apollo loves tug at the leash, bounce around and bark and bark with bravoism every time we spot them, but if they venture too close or hiss at him, where is he?

Behind me. Yep, he's my cowardly lion.

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Construction worker

Say "yum."

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Politics

Some of you readers know I work for a publication that follows politics closely. This year, it's a boon because I get to hear or read about all the juicy details. Most of the folks at the office are leaning toward Obama, but that's not a huge surprise considering that DC is heavily democratic.

Because we're just getting into the meat the campaign, there are still a lot of questions about what the candidates are all about, and who's the best man. I haven't officially decided, but I can say that I'm leaning left right now -- primarily because I don't support McCain/Plain's energy platforms.

When in doubt, run the other way.

I probably will post now and then about the politics, but I won't force-feed my views. I do however believe in encouraging people to discuss the candidates and to look at not only the candidates' background (ie, McCain's POW experiences), but primarily at their platforms. Why? Look at it this way. What if it were a Gulf War vet...whose job was rebuilding towns in Middle East? Is he any less qualified because he wasn't captured by enemies? Or someone who wanted to serve - but couldn't for health reasons? They're not a great examples, but I think it helps convey my point, which is that having a triumphantly sad story shouldn't be the sole deciding factor in picking your man.

OK, I'm going to hop off the soapbox. Here's a link that's slightly slanted in Obama's favor (I only say that because many of the front page criticisms are about the GOP party currently), but is very informative:

http://www.factcheck.org/

It analyzes statements made in speeches and commercials and explains why they're right on, a stretch of truth or outright false.

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I return!

KR got hitched this weekend, and the wedding was just lovely! I was silly and didn't use my flash even though I had it, so my pictures aren't very good, but I did snag a few gems. KR gets the first rights to them, then I'll pass them out to interested folks if she Okays it.

It was terrific to have a chance to see my friends, including my old climbing buddy, and a few people I hadn't seen in awhile. Everyone looked wonderful, I had a ball and I was sorry to leave. If there was some way I could scoop them all up and take them with me to my next hometown, I would.
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Last week, my grocery store had a sale on t-bone steaks and I snagged a $17 steak for $8 and change. It was ginormous and fed me fed me for several days. There's no doubt that I'm a steak n' potatoes girl. Nom nom.

Note: The green spots you see is NOT mold. They're pieces of lettuce from my salad that I spilled. Really.

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I can't say I know what

beets taste like, or whether I'd like them, but...
These look a little poisonous to me. One of nature's ways of signaling "poison alert!" to critters is through bright colors. And it's not a terrible stretch of imagination to picture these as sperm. In short...no thanks!


In other news. I'm going to be AWOL for a few days. Here's a picture to tide ya'all over for awhile.

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Size does matter...

at least it does when it comes to these suckers - Each one is $0.69, regardless of size or weight. I want my money's worth! All 69 cents!

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I hate florescent lights

I can never shoot a good picture without having to fix it in photoshop.

That said...One of my favorite fruits:

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