Two Things I Observed on Metro this Morning

1. A full grown, handsome man clad in a snazzy-looking suit and overcoat, carrying a ragged-looking doll stroller.
Mr. Snazzy-Guy, I really hope it was for some weird work presentation. That'd be cool.

2. The ordinary-looking guy sitting next to me on the metro was watching...porn on his ipod.
Mr. Perv, seriously, don't watch that in public. The last thing we need at 8 AM is for you to get a hard-on on a train full of people. If that happened, I would've pointed and mocked you. Loudly.